Now that the season has started, I'm hearing from many of my lesson students (and their parents) that being nervous in games is negatively affecting their performance. This is super common, especially in Little League as young players are still learning how to manage the mental side of being an athlete, so here's some quick advice that I think will help ballplayers stay relaxed and confident on the field, which will allow them to perform their best, and some advice for parents to help support their kids athletic performance.

First, for players:

1. Nobody expects you to be perfect. Mookie Betts gets 3 strikes, just like you do, and Clayton Kershaw gets 4 balls, just like you do. Why? Because nobody hits the ball every time they swing and nobody throws a strike every pitch. Remember that the game is designed to give you lots of opportunities to hit the ball or throw strikes because...
2. Baseball is HARD. Lebron doesn't get 3 tries on each possession to make a shot; he gets 1. But Ohtani gets 3 (or more tries) to hit the ball. Tiger doesn't get 4 tries to make a putt; he gets 1. But Verlander gets 4 balls before he walks a guy. A kicker in the NFL doesn't get unlimited tries to make a field goal; he gets 1. Freddie Freeman can hit literally infinity foul balls according to the rules of baseball. The game is hard, be kind to yourself.
3. There is A LOT you can't control, so focus on what you can. The other team, the umpire, the scoreboard, and bad hops are all things you can't control. Your focus, your attitude, your hustle, your mechanics, and how your support your teammates are things you can control. Most kids get nervous about things they can't control (Am I going to get hit by the pitch? Am I going to give up runs? Will we win today?). Focus on what you can control and you'll feel less nervous.
4. Nobody performs well when they put too much pressure on themselves. Remember that you're playing baseball in order to HAVE FUN. If you treat every pitch like life and death, not only will you not have fun, but unrealistic pressure is debilitating. Focus on playing with joy and having fun being with your teammates, and you'll play better. Big League managers know this so they work really hard all season to make sure their players are feeling relaxed, have great team chemistry, and are having fun.

For Parents and Coaches:

1. No coaching from the the stands! Many, but of course not all, kids feel pressure trying to live up to adult expectations and if you are constantly coaching them from the stands, all they will think about is what YOU are thinking about THEIR play. This pressure takes their focus away from the game making it harder for them to have success, which in turn makes parents want to coach even more, which puts more pressure on them. Genuinely well-intentioned "help" can start a vicious cycle that makes the game less fun for kids, and actually makes it more difficult for them to reach their potential.
2. Have realistic expectations. This doesn't mean to expect your kid to hit .300 this season instead of .750. What it does mean is show understanding when they strike out, make an error, swing at a bad pitch, or walk 3 players in a row. All of those things will happen to EVERY SINGLE PLAYER on Earth this season, from Little League to the Big Leagues. So, let's not put higher expectations on kids than we would our favorite MLB player.
3. Celebrate great effort. Especially in baseball, there will be lots of games with "no stats." Lebron scores every single game. Mahomes completes passes every single game. But there will be LOTS of games this season when Ohtani goes 0-4. There will be LOTS of games when Will Smith doesn't throw any baserunners out. And lots of games where Chris Taylor gets zero fly balls hit to him. So if we always celebrate great effort, even (especially?) after games when they didn't have any stats (and that happens a lot in baseball), they'll understand that there are many different ways to provide value to the team. If they consistently hear this message from you, if they know you think that as long as they played as hard as they could that you're proud of them (regardless of outcomes), then they won't feel such intense pressure to get a hit every at-bat, which absolutely will make it more likely they do get a hit.
4. Do not talk about tough games on the car ride home. Just let the game be over. If they want to talk, then just listen. But if they don't bring it up, just let it go. I read something profound the other day that I think is often true. It said: "Kids don't quit sports on the field, they quit sports on the car ride home." I know how hard that can be to not talk about the game, but I promise that not immediately breaking down all the mistakes they made or things they didn't do well will pay dividends in the long run. If you saw things with their swing, or pitching mechanics, or defense that needs improvement, wait until their next practice to work on it - there's no need to talk about any of those things while their emotions might still be raw from the game.

Just like everything else in life, learning new skills (in this case, how not to be nervous) is a process but the sooner we can start setting our players up for success mentally, the sooner they'll start having success on the field!

Play Hard, Have Fun!