I've been teaching kids to focus on the "controllables" for more than 2 decades.

Players can control their attitude, effort, energy, sportsmanship, teamwork, and hustle every single time they step foot on a field.

They can't control the weather, the official's calls, bad hops, what the other team does, or the sun being in their eyes.

Worrying about things we can't control is a waste of energy that always results in young athletes being distracted from focusing on the things they can control.

One "uncontrollable" that isn't talked enough about in youth sports is size and I want to dive into that topic today because of a play that happened in my son's flag football game on Saturday.

Early in the second half, we ran a pass play where our QB made a great throw to our wide receiver who was covered perfectly by the other team's defender. Our receiver reached up to make the catch and the young defender immediately got visibly upset that he didn't prevent the completion.

The other team's coach quickly ran over to the frustrated player and said "your defense on that play was awesome, he's just taller than you!"

It was true; our wide receiver was about 6 inches taller than their defender which is a huge advantage when reaching up to catch a ball.

I thought that was the perfect response to pump the player up for a job well done, even though the result wasn't what he wanted!

It also crystalized a very important point; the size difference in kids under the age of 12 can be massive and oftentimes the bigger kids simply have an advantage that is impossible to overcome until everyone hits their growth spurt in a few years and size more or less evens out.

For parents of kids on the average or smaller size right now, DO NOT WORRY! Your son will grow and as long as he's having fun and working to improve his skills, what might look like him "being behind" right now simply because he's not as tall, strong, or fast as bigger kids will not be an issue in a few years.

Conversely for parents who have the "big kid" who dominates right now, DO NOT GET TOO EXCITED! All your son's peers will eventually catch up in size and the success he's having right now might actually work against him in the long run if he relies too much on his physical gifts at this stage and doesn't work as hard as he could be at developing his skills. So, if you've got the big kid, also make sure he's having fun and developing his skills so that when he's not the "big kid" anymore, he can still compete.

To dig deeper...

Of course, a taller 10 year old has an advantage grabbing rebounds in basketball. Does that mean he's necessarily a better player or has a higher ceiling in the sport simply because crashing the boards is easier for him right now? Absolutely not.

Of course, a smaller kid in baseball can't hit for as much power as some bigger kids. Does that mean he's worse at baseball or has a lower ceiling in the sport? Absolutely not.

Of course, an 11 year old who weighs 140 pounds has an advantage playing offensive line in football. Does that mean he'll definitely be the best lineman in High School? No way.

To use a specific baseball example: Think of every kid who hit a ball over the fence at your Little League last season. What was true about every single one of them? They were much bigger and stronger than their peers! Does that take away from their accomplishment? Of course not! But is their current success because of their current size advantage an indication of future success? Nope! And does it mean that the smaller kids who can't hit homeruns yet have no future in the sport? Absolutely not!

I was on the smaller size growing up and didn't hit a homerun for the first time until my sophomore year of high school. Zero career Little League homeruns for this future professional baseball player.

The kid who led my Little League in DC with 13 homeruns as a 12 year old? He never made varsity in High School.

This is yet another example (backed by numerous more statistically significant studies) pointing to the fact that "success" at the youth levels is not an accurate predicator of success in the post-puberty years.

So what are the key takeaways from this?

First, always make sure your young athlete is having fun and wants to continue playing sports. That is without a doubt the single most powerful predictor of who will play in high school; if your son quits sports when he's 13, guess who has a 0% chance of making the freshman team when he's 15?!?!

Second, make sure your young athlete is learning to play their sports the right way; learning correct fundamentals at a young age is important.

Third, make sure you're focusing on the most important "win" in youth sports which is learning teamwork, goal setting, sportsmanship, and dealing with adversity because even if your son quits playing teams sports at age 13, he will have gained many of the life skills he'll need as a student, young adult, and eventually as parent himself, regardless of how big a role sports plays in his life.

And for baseball specifically, the best part of physical size? It doesn't matter!

NLCS MVP Tommy Edman is 5' 10'' and the starting shortstop for the Yankees, Anthony Volpe, is even smaller!

Play Hard, Have Fun!